Mad Cow Disease is no joke. Especially when it’s happening to me. Really, only when it’s happening to me, otherwise, it’s pretty damn funny, let’s be honest. I mean, it’s called “Mad Cow,” which is hilarious. And, yes, I realize the scientific name is something like “Bovine Spongybrain” or something, but the folks who came up with “Mad Cow”? I tip my hat to you, sirs and madams.
ANYway, now that we’ve all agreed that Mad Cow is hysterical when it happens to other people, let’s get back to me.
I’m pretty sure I have the non-funny form of Mad Cow based on the following evidence:
- I ate some meat.
- I may have posted a nude photo of myself online, but I’m not sure because . . .
- . . . I seem to have brain problems.
Proof of Brain Problems
I almost bought a new blender despite the fact that the old one is RIGHT HERE where I walk past every day.
I almost bought a duplicate pair of my favorite shoes because I couldn’t find mine despite the fact that they were RIGHT HERE where I walk past every day.
I spent an hour searching for Pru, convinced she’d gotten outside or flushed down the toilet (it could happen) when the whole time she was in the chair I sit in EVERY DAY!
That’s Mad Cow, right? RIGHT? You can tell me. Don’t spare my feelings. Believe, me, I’d tell you. And would I ever laugh.
Learn More About Our Friend, the Mad Cow
- Official Mad Cow Disease Home Page (warning: this site contains links to articles titled “Calf Cannibalism Continues” and “Scrapie dans un boeuf”). MOO! I mean, BOO!
- “God Made Cows to Eat” Does a 9-year-old boy have all the answers? (Hint: no.)
- A Dee-lightful Alternative to the Dangerous Hamburger (I SWEAR, if you click on this . . .)
- OK, Seriously, An Alternative to the Dangerous Hamburger (HAHAHAHAHA!)
JD sincerely apologizes to any blindies out there. Kids! Visit your eye doctor! Blindness, unlike Mad Cow Disease, is NO JOKE.