I Have a Goiter
Published by JD September 9th, 2007 in I See Doctors.A lump in my throat, the size of a boulder*
Goiters! They’re not just for old ladies anymore.
Actually goiters are pretty common, especially among women. I’ve been the proud owner of a goiter since I was about 26.
At that time, I was diagnosed with Graves’ Disease, or hyperactive thyroid, which is characterized by shakiness, heart palpitations, weight loss, and an increase in appetite. Yup, increased appetite and weight loss. Those were good, good, unhealthy times. Sadly, as is often the case, my Graves’ turned into Hashimoto’s thyroiditis, which is hypothyroidism. Low energy, weight gain, and—so unfair!—no decrease in appetite!
Goiter is just another way of saying “enlarged thyroid gland.” My thyroid is about 4 times bigger than normal. That sounds huge, but believe me, there are WAY more huge goiters out there. If you’re curious, just Google-image “goiter” and then see if you can swallow normally for the next 15 minutes.
I take a pill to keep my goiter from getting any bigger and also to regulate my thyroid function. I’d love to blame my excess weight on my slow thyroid, but I just ate 4 donuts in one sitting, so maybe I’m partly responsible.
Speaking of food, have you ever heard of goitrogenic foods? If you think you may have thyroid problems, you’d best be avoiding rutabagas, millet, and turnips.
A goiter, tho lumpy, doesn’t fall into the category of “lovely lady lumps,” I’m sorry to say. I don’t think it’s that noticeable, but my doctor does, and he would love to slice open my neck and scoop it out. However, it’s really not causing me any problems (other than having to chew my food for 10 minutes so I can swallow without choking and dying).
You know, I kind of like my goiter. I think I’ll keep it.
Did You Know?
- Your thyroid gland is shaped like a butterfly (aww, pretty!)
- Thyroid disease is an auto-immune disease, which is medical jargon for “We don’t know what causes it!”
- George H.W. Bush, his wife, Barbara, and their DOG, Millie, all had thyroid problems
If you think you may have a goiter:
- Don’t panic! They’re common and treatable. Get your big bulging neck to an endocrinologist, who can perform some simple and painless tests
- Visit Mary Shomon’s site for all things goiterous and thyroidian
- Consider purchasing some of these attractive neck-wear items to hide that disgusting bulge in your throat:
* Today’s lyrics are courtesy of Dream Theater.
12 Responses to “I Have a Goiter”
- 1 Pingback on Sep 28th, 2007 at 8:13 am
- 2 Trackback on Sep 28th, 2007 at 3:41 pm
aw, i am with you: i don’t think your goiter is at all that noticeable…unless accompanied by a diagrammed photo with lovely arrows for those of us who actually though of “gaiter” and wondered what a photo of someone’s throat was doing up here when we should be looking at legs.
and how did all the Bushs, including their dog, get thryoid problems? Maybe it was some sort of osmosis?
I love the humorous blog theme you’ve got going here. And, haha…the arrow pointing to “pre-cancerous freckles” made me laugh out loud!!
Thanks, Joanne! Hey, I’ve read about you in a certain Pirate Story, haven’t I? I’ve checked out your blog a few times–it’s really good. And curly-haired women RULE!
Thanks, Miki. Yeah, I usually don’t walk around with a giant arrow pointing to it. How many people even know the word “gaiter”?? That’s so funny.
I didn’t think thyroiditis was contagious; maybe it was something in the water? Not enough salt? WEIRD!
Dang. I did this too. If I had know you had already done it… I wouldn’t have?!?!?
Kimberly: Maybe this is one of those things you had to do, even tho I did it so you didn’t have to…? I hope yours went well and you got good results. Dang, indeed!
JD’s last blog post..I Love the 80s so you don’t have to
so what is the best solution for goiter? and how it will be prevented? what if its from heredity? it can be treatment or not?
Mary: I’m no expert, but if a goiter is big enough, a doctor will prescribe medication to keep it from getting any bigger. Then it’s usually just monitored. Thyroid disease is definitely hereditary (tho not always). I’m not sure if it’s possible to prevent a goiter, but the treatment, like I said, is usually thyroid replacement medication that you take for the rest of your life.
Hope this was of some help!
It looks like “madam’s” apple
Mark: All right, now that is just damn funny. Why haven’t I thought of that before? HA! I’m stealing it . . .