To be more literal, I got f*%#ing torn apart so you don’t have to.
But to be less literal, I didn’t get torn apart at all. Just kind of dented.
YESSSS! The folks at Ask and Ye Shall Receive reviewed my blog. Here’s the deal: you bravely submit your blog to a site whose URL is
(yeah, I know, the “blogspot” kind of nullifies the feeling of terror), and one of the writers will read your blog and review it. For free! After they review it, the submitter is supposed to immediately regret it and write a post complaining about their bad review.
But I won’t be complaining. After all, I asked for a review and I received one. That’s the deal. I didn’t ask for a favorable review or a well-written review or even a non-hungover review, just a review.
So, of course you should go over there and read the review yourself, but here are some highlights:
My blog is sometimes clever and well done.
My writing is at times fluffy, vanilla, and goobersome (mmmm, that sounds like a recipe for a delicious cake).
My template sucks
But the absolute best statement? Wait for it. Here’s a direct quote:
It is, absolutely, the worst, most incongruous header for a blog imaginable.
Oh, man. Did I mention that this was a FREE review? You can’t pay for publicity like this. What do people click on? Pictures of fluffy kittens? Recipes for cupcakes? Porn? Well, yes. But what people really want to see is the absolute WORST of anything. And you can find that right here, baby. You may agree, you may disagree—you will certainly gag and convulse and die—but it’s all sweet, sweet traffic!
And in the end, isn’t that all we care about?
Seriously, tho, I have to defend the creator of the template, Headset Options. In my endless tweaking, I may have ruined everything, but my intentions were good. And I should say that the header image was not part of the original template.
I have wanted to change my header image for a while. Corrina at My Random Blog did some really nice mock-ups for me, but I kind of want to try my hand at creating something myself. I still don’t know what to do, but it’ll come to me. Hopefully before any more people gag, convulse, and die.
As for the other stuff, I’m a keep on writing the way I do, about the things I do. As I promised in my very first post, I do things. Some will be boring, some will be silly, some will be moving, and a lot will be nude. I can’t change now. As Peter O’Toole once said (of me): “The damage has been done. There is a legend, there is a myth: to protest is daft.”
I would really like some honest feedback about the look of my site. I realize not everyone loves it, but my main concern is that it is readable and easy to navigate. If your opinions are best expressed anonymously, please enter the poll. I also welcome comments: positive, negative, suggestions for improvement, exclamations of disgust. Lay it on me. I can take it.
Whatever you have to say can’t be any worse than “Gragh.”
And be glad I got f*%#ing torn apart so you don’t have to.
They like the F-word at humor blogs.