Happy I Do Things-Ween!

I’ve been tagged for the always-popular “8 Random Things” and “7 Quirky Things” memes by some of my blogging pals:

And since I’ve already done quirky and random, I thought I’d fulfill my meme duty with something a little different . . . and terrifying!

Herewith, in honor of Halloween:

10 Terrifying Things I’ve Done So You Don’t Have To

But wait! There is a (terrifying) twist to this list. Two of the things are outright lies. Yes! Two! Lies! I did not do TWO things on this list! Can you guess which two of these 10 terrifying things are not true? The first person to guess correctly will win EITHER

BOOOO! A terrifying keychain! (That not-so-terrifying dotted outline will NOT be on the finished product.)


1,000 terrifying Entrecard points! Brrrrrr!

The second person to guess correctly will win:


So, are you with me? The first two people to guess the two lies will win either a limited-edition I Do Things Sleeping Cat keychain or 1,000 flavorful EC points.

OK, here are the Ten Terrifying Things, complete with random capitalization for extra TERROR:

  1. In my wild youth, I accepted LSD from a total stranger. And TOOK it!
  2. In my not-so-wild adulthood, I touched my eyeball AFTER touching a jalapeno pepper.
  3. I recently flew—on an airplane—withOUT my sedative.
  4. I once saw a toilet overflow. WITH TOILET CONTENTS!
  5. I dressed up as a terrifying GEISHA GIRL for a college Halloween party.
  6. I watched Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer and couldn’t sleep for THREE WEEKS.
  7. I continue to wear that one pair of shorts with a big HOLE in the butt.
  8. As a child, I went into the neighborhood haunted house on a dare. ALONE!
  9. In high school, I dragged my friends to see The Exorcist . . . and REGRETTED it!
  10. I once dreamt about a scary dinosaur attack and couldn’t sleep for THREE WEEKs.

This terrifying contest will end on Wednesday, November 5, at approximately 5:00 or as soon as my first Vicodin wears off, UNLESS no one has guessed correctly, in which case someone named “DJ” from “I Stew Kings” will comment and win it all. Or, perhaps Gus will pick two random commenters. Who can say. It’s just too terrifying to think about.

Edited to add: The results will be posted on Thursday, November 6.

In true terrifying I Do Things fashion, NO ONE will be tagged for this meme, but ANYONE can grab it.


Terrifyingly funny

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56 Responses to “I Do TERRIFYING Things”

  1. 1 Jenn Thorson

    I think the LSD and entering the haunted house by yourself thing are the lies. But, even if not, it’s a great list.

    And I’ve done that to myself with the jalepenos. Totally maced ME. The good news was, I could really breathe well for a few days.

    Jenn Thorson’s last blog post..Night of a Thousand Pixie Stix

  2. 2 Jaffer

    I’m going to say number 6 and number 10 !

    I don’t think I can sleep now.

    Jaffer’s last blog post..Surviving a corrupt WordPress database

  3. 3 Kelly

    I’m going to guess #1 and #3 are LIES! Goodness knows *I* would never fly without my sedatives if I had sedatives to take.

    Kelly’s last blog post..Doodle Week: Trick or Treat

  4. 4 Kathy who ate Halloween candy for breakfast

    I can’t believe, even in your wild youth, you would have accepted LSD from a stranger and took it. Unless LSD stands for Large Sugary Donut.

    My guesses are #1 and #10.

    I’d really like to have a limited edition I Do Things keychain! It’d make my keys so happy!

    Kathy who ate Halloween candy for breakfast’s last blog post..Halloween Doctor’s Visit

  5. 5 Singular Girl

    I think I’m going to say #8 and #10… although I may live to regret my choices because if I believe that you have accepted LSD from a stranger I don’t know why you wouldn’t enter a neighborhood haunted house on your own… of course, maybe the LSD helped you in your quest to enter the haunted house and it may have facilitated that scary “when dinosaurs attack” dream too… Damn, now I have no clue.

    Singular Girl’s last blog post..All we need now is a pole…

  6. 6 April

    I’m guessing that #1 & #10 are the LIES.

    LOL Kathy @ Large Sugary Donut

    I’ve touched my eyeball after handling jalapenos. If you haven’t done that I highly recommend you don’t. Unless, of course, you ENJOY being BLIND for a week.

    Random capitalization brought to you by entirely too much coffee.

  7. 7 Sara - Random Internet fan

    I am guessing #1 and #10 also!

    And I’ve done the jalapeno eyeball thing too, not fun!

  8. 8 Condo Blues

    I’m going with #1 and #5. How can Geisha’s be scary? They serve tea.

  9. 9 Daisy the Curly Devil Cat

    You really live life on the edge! I am going to guess 5 and 9.

    Happy Halloween!

    Daisy the Curly Devil Cat’s last blog post..Happy Halloween!

  10. 10 absepa

    My guess is #5 and #9. Come on, keychain!

    I, too, have touched my eyeball after handling a jalapeno pepper–I couldn’t stand to put my contacts in for three days. At least I’m not the only one!

    absepa’s last blog post..Apparently, A Post Title is Required

  11. 11 Athena

    Guessing 3 and 5, here!

    I feel like I always come here and dirty up your comment section, but I once touched “something else” on certain male someone after chopping jalapenos…his reaction was pretty funny (screaming, jumping in the shower, crying a little) but I wouldnt want it to happen to me!

    Athena’s last blog post..Me, some strippers and lots of vodka – Halloween 2008

  12. 12 Natural

    JD, I’d like to use one of my life lines and call a friend.

    ringing. asking question. got answer.

    JD, the answers are no 6 and no 10, please send me my key chain. thank you.

    and here’s why: it wasn’t 3 weeks, it was 3 days, but you do like zombies and maybe you didn’t sleep for 3 weeks.

    i’d like to try the 50/50 then.

    Natural’s last blog post..Answering Comments: Obligation, Optional or Off?

  13. 13 JD

    Jenn Thorson: I’m glad you enjoyed the list but sorry you experienced the terror of the jalapeno pepper (which is starting to sound like a common complaint around here). Beware the terrifying jalapeno!

    Jaffer: Well, I hope your sleeplessness doesn’t last for THREE WEEKS! (Is Ronald going to play?)

    Kelly: Mmm . . . sedatives. Good for what ails ya.

    Kathy who ate Halloween candy for breakfast: HA HA HA! Anything involving me and a Large Sugary Donut could never be a lie. Unfortunately, LSD stands for exactly what you think it does.

    Singular Girl: Your comment has terrified and confused even me! The list is a conundrum, isn’t it?

    April: Thank you for your recommendation AND the random capitalization. I thoroughly enjoyed both.

    Sara – Random Internet fan: Another jalapeno victim! (I love your name.) Thanks for playing!

    Condo Blues: I don’t know. Some Geishas do kind of creep me out. Do they ever talk? Are they even human? Maybe they’re GIANT DOLLS!

    Daisy the Curly Devil Cat: Happy Halloween, Daisy, and thanks for playing! I hope you and Harley get lots of good treats today.

    absepa: Oof! I don’t wear contacts, but that sounds painful.

    Athena: Oh, your dirtiness is always welcome here. Only man can say whether jalapeno pain is worse on the eyeball or on the . . . appendage. Hee! It does sound funny, tho.

    Natural: I admire your persistence. But the stakes are VERY high here, so I cannot allow any life lines.

  14. 14 Babs - beetle

    I think you did them all, and more! ;O)

    I think….

    No. 1
    No. 10

    Oh I just noticed that Kathy chose the same. Two great minds and all that!

    Babs – beetle’s last blog post..A Halloween Special

  15. 15 stephanie barr

    I’m guessing #5 and #10. I wish I had a witty reason why, but I’m all tapped out.

    Here’s an interesting thing, though, I’ve never done ANY of the things on the list, including the lies, except flown without a sedative – because I don’t take sedatives for flight. It sounds like a good idea though. Sleeping pills do not, apparently, work on me, even for a trip across the Atlantic. I’ve been back a week and I’m STILL tired, which does not help with my anniversary today.

    I guess you did it all so I didn’t have to. Reading the list, once again, I’m grateful.

    stephanie barr’s last blog post..The recipe for judgement…

  16. 16 kristina

    6 and 9 must be the lies…

  17. 17 stephanie barr

    My mistake, I’ve seen a toilet overflow and, though I’ve never worn shorts that had a hole in the butt (that I knew about), I once did so with jeans that had been eaten through with sulfuric acid (when I worked that summer in the chemical lab).

    stephanie barr’s last blog post..The recipe for judgement…

  18. 18 Wayne

    I’m going to say #5, because I just can’t see a geisha girl being terrifying…more like sexy, Hey Come here! What’s your name? How you doin’?

    Hmm, #7 also. Not sure why, I just think you’ve done everything else on the list, especially the LSD. :)

  19. 19 chat blanc

    I’m guessing. . . 8 & 9 :)

    chat blanc’s last blog post..Happy Halloween!

  20. 20 lala

    My guess is #3 and #5.

    lala’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday: Fishing Gear

  21. 21 Canucklehead

    Put me down for number 3 and number 10 !
    Most seem to agree on #10 and I knew you flew lately, its the drug-free part I’m struggling with. Happy Halloween – eat, drink and be scary! CHEERS!

  22. 22 Regan

    I’m going to guess all of them so I can win a keychain.


  23. 23 Joe

    No doubt about it, 7 and 10.

    You don’t seem to be the type of lady to wear holey underwear.

    Dinosaur attack? Naw, I just don’t think so.

    Joe’s last blog post..Caption Winners Announced

  24. 24 Jay

    I think the eyeball/jalapeno pepper is one of the lies. And the other is … the Exorcist thing. I believe that you dragged your friends there, but I don’t believe you regretted it! LOL!

    Jay’s last blog post..Andrew Sachs

  25. 25 JD

    Babs – beetle: Great minds, indeed . . . or ARE they?

    stephanie barr: No need to force the witty. I know it’s there. I’m glad I could help you out with at least 8, no! 7 terrifying things.

    kristina: Must they? Perhaps . . .

    Wayne: Oh, “especially the LSD,” eh? Hee! Well, we’ll see. As for whether or not geisha girls are terrifying, see my comment to Condo Blues above. (they never talk!)

    chat blanc: Your guesses have been noted. Happy Halloween!

    lala: Thanks for playing! We’ll see how you do when Wednesday rolls around.

    Regan: Happy Halloween, to YOU, you big cheater!

    Joe: Aw, that’s nice of you to call me a lady. Thanks for playing!

    Jay: HA! I like the way you reason through your answers. We’ll see if reasoning pays off!

  26. 26 Preston

    Damn! Joe took my numbers. I wanted numbers 7 and 10. Hmmmmm I’ll go with 7 (holey pants) and 8 (haunted house dare). Am I close?

    Preston’s last blog post..Happy Halloween!

  27. 27 Poetikat

    This is my first time here, so I don’t know you very well at all, but I will guess the LSD and the sedative for the plane-trip.

    You would not get me in a haunted house for a million smackeroonies!


    Poetikat’s last blog post..Hallowe’en Muppet-style!

  28. 28 Jeff

    3 and 7. You would crap your pants without your sedative. Therefore you would never wear underwear with holes in them. Logic wins!

    btw… BOO!

    Jeff’s last blog post..…also make sure you have some Beano

  29. 29 Duck

    I’m thinking 2 and 8???

    OHhhhhh this is hard!

    I totally hope the Geisha one is correct though. That’s awesome!

    Duck’s last blog post..Halloween Hair

  30. 30 Babs - beetle

    I so want one of those key rings. If I’m not right I’ll scream and scream and scream, until I make myself sick! ;O)

    Babs – beetle’s last blog post..A Halloween Special

  31. 31 Cindy Lietz, Polymer Clay Tutor

    I think #1 and #10 are lies… #1 I’m just hoping you didn’t do and # 10 is just to0 lame to do… Especially since you already lost three weeks of sleep from the scary movie!

    Cindy Lietz, Polymer Clay Tutor’s last blog post..Color Quiz Helps Polymer Clay and Jewelry Artists with Mixing Colors

  32. 32 Jenny

    You are NOT still wearing those shorts and you did NOT fly without your sedative!


    Jenny’s last blog post..I’m Voting For The Unborn

  33. 33 JD

    Preston: You’ll know on Wednesday! (scary music plays)

    Poetikat: Welcome! I don’t think you’re at much of a disadvantage if this is your first visit. I do hope you’ll come back!

    Jeff: A HA HA HA! Logic MAY win, my friend. I do appreciate your reasoning. Also—BOO!

    Duck: I hope it’s not too hard. It should be fun—but also terrifying. Geishas are awesome, aren’t they?

    Babs – beetle: Oh, no! I’m glad you like the key ring, but I don’t want you to make yourself sick over it!

    Cindy Lietz, Polymer Clay Tutor: Heh. Maybe, maybe not. Thanks for playing and don’t forget to tune in next Wednesday!

    Jenny: LOLOL yourself, missy!

  34. 34 Woody

    #3 – I’m guessing you definitely would not fly without the sedative.

    #9 – You might have taken those friends to see The Exorcist but did NOT regret it one little bit!!

    Woody’s last blog post..Tag – I’m It!

  35. 35 Tim

    Ah, a challenge! Let’s review:
    1. I recall reading that you “accepted drugs and a motorcycle ride from a total stranger” – could this be the same event?
    2. You like hot stuff, like Hog’s Breath Jalapeno Sauce, so this is entirely possible
    3. I dunno… on the way home from Canada you took EXTRA sedatives!
    4. Hasn’t everyone seen the toilet thing?
    5. You were probably a fantastic (and terrifyingly beautiful) geisha girl
    6. No one stays awake for three weeks :)
    7. You probably wear these shorts to the office (at home)
    8. I think you are crazy like that
    9. the only part about this one I’m not sure of is the regret
    10. The only way you stayed awake for three weeks is if your hands were clenched so tight that your thumbs were touching the rest of your hands, and as we all know, JD can’t sleep under these kinds of conditions!
    I guess 6 & 10

    Tim’s last blog post..Quiting Smoking, Second Hand Gum and Non-Chewing Sections

  36. 36 flit

    jalepenos in eyeballs – definitely bad…I’m rather happy to hear that there are so many of us that have found that out the hard way though.

    Hubby finds it hilarious every time I do it… yes, yes, I know… you would think that once would be enough.

    flit’s last blog post..The good news

  37. 37 Stellaluna

    I once dreamt about a scary dinosaur attack and couldn’t sleep for THREE WEEKs.
    —-Huh? Dinosaur attack? That’s not scary hehehe—–

    In my not-so-wild adulthood, I touched my eyeball AFTER touching a jalapeno pepper.

    —Ouchie! Even I can’t do that!—-

    That was my guesses, I

    Stellaluna’s last blog post..La realidad de los dedos de Stellaluna…

  38. 38 Stellaluna

    Oh! Sorry, somethign happened to the page!

    I….hope I am rigth with the answers :)

    Stellaluna’s last blog post..La realidad de los dedos de Stellaluna…

  39. 39 Money Bush

    You’re crazy and I love your blog. Keep it up.
    BTW I was happy to subscribe.

    Money Bush’s last blog post..ScratchBack Links: Tip Jar for Blogs

  40. 40 Elle

    3 and 10, but those people have already guessed them, so I’m way down the keychain chain. Damn the slow email delivery around here! Next time I see the emailman, I’ll threaten to withhold his Christmas Goodie Bonus!

    Elle’s last blog post..Ghosts of Halloweens Past

  41. 41 JD

    Canucklehead: Boy, Akismet does NOT like you. Anyhoo, how kind of you to have problems thinking of me as being drug-free! Loved your Halloween pix. Hope you and your family had a great time, even if your pumpkin didn’t end up looking like David Letterman.

    Woody: Hee! We shall see! Oh, this is hard. I want to spill the beans NOW!

    Tim: Wow, now here is someone who has done his homework. BUT! Will it pay off? I do appreciate the hours of painstaking analysis you must have done.

    flit: Yes, the jalapeno thing is pretty popular. I wonder why?

    Stellaluna: I didn’t get your answers! Do you want to try again? Come back! Oh, wait! Never mind. I see them. Please ignore me.

    Money Bush: Thank you so much! Glad to have you aboard.

    Elle: Oh, poo. I’m sorry your emailman is so slow. Ours is usually pretty quick, but then I do leave cereal marshmallows in our mailbox for him.

  42. 42 Meg

    I am so done with jalapeno peppers in my life!

    This is a great list. I’m going to say #3 and #8.

    Meg’s last blog post..Couch Surfing USA – The One I Said Yes To

  43. 43 Fancy

    I think 9 and 10 are not true. 9 because I don’t think you were in high school when The Exorcist came out and 10 because it followed 9.

    Fancy’s last blog post..Princess Jersey says

  44. 44 dcr

    The scary thing is that I have no idea! I’ve learned things about fellow bloggers this week that I wouldn’t have expected, so anything is possible.

    My guess would be 6 & 10, which has already been guessed since I’m late to the game here, but it doesn’t seem probable that someone would not be able to sleep for three weeks. Perhaps not sleep well, but sleep nonetheless.

    dcr’s last blog post..Happy Halloween!

  45. 45 The Hawg

    I’m going with 1 & 10. Why? You’re too smart for “1″ and it’s impossible to stay awake for three weeks.

    Perhaps I just like sleep too much…

    The Hawg’s last blog post..The Hawg helps his kids hunt the big candy

  46. 46 Lux

    I just have to guess: 1 and 3 are lies. Yep. That’s what I think.

    1 – the total stranger part tipped me off – you’d have to know the pusher
    2 – no one flies w/out a sedative


    Lux’s last blog post..You’re all the bestest!

  47. 47 Florida Girl In Sydney

    I’ll take numbers 7 & 8. I feel like I’m on the American Psychic Challenge… and I LIKE IT.

    Florida Girl In Sydney’s last blog post..Sculpture by the Sea 2008

  48. 48 JD

    Meg: HA! Such finality! Are you sure? Jalapenos can be very delicious on hot dogs! Thank you for playing!

    Fancy: Your reasoning fascinates me. So are you saying I’m way too OLD to have been in high school when The Exorcist came out, HMMMM?

    dcr: Well, that is truly terrifying, for I feel you know me pretty well. Good guesses. BUT! Are they good enough . . .?

    The Hawg: Thanks for playing, The Hawg! I AM smart and I DO like sleep, but . . . ????!!! (clearly running out of ways to avoid giving away the answers)

    Lux: “You’d have to know the pusher.” Hmmm. You sound a little too experienced, with the drug lingo and stuff. Perhaps there’s something you’d like to tell us?

    Florida Girl in Sydney: WOO! You’d almost HAVE to be psychic to guess these terrifying lies!

  49. 49 brooke

    I believe that the two lies are 3 and 8. Also i really want teh key chain it is so terrifiying

  50. 50 JD

    brooke: Thanks for playing! Yes, the key chain is terrifying, isn’t it???

  51. 51 brooke

    Very terrifing I think I’m going to dress like it for Halloween next year and scare all the children or not.

  52. 52 Jenn

    I am going to say # 6 and #9 are the lies

    Jenn’s last blog post..Free sex toys — and much more — for voting!!!

  53. 53 JD

    Jenn: Ooookay, Jenn! Thanks for playing!

  54. 54 Shieldmaiden96

    I’m feeling #7 and #10.

    Shieldmaiden96′s last blog post..The Audacity of Soap

  55. 55 Joe

    It’s Wednesday. May I have my key chain now?


    Joe’s last blog post..Caption this for craptacular prizes

  56. 56 JD

    Shieldmaiden96: and Joe: The results will be announced tomorrow! Thanks for playing!


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