I Am Quotable
Published by JD July 11th, 2008 in I Am Kind of Awesome, I Blog.Thought I heard you mention my name
Can’t you talk any louder
You may have read ol’ Junk Drawer Kathy’s glowing review of Blogtations, a wonderful “where have you been all my life” site that culls quotations from worthy blogs. It’s not only a great idea, but Musing (the site owner) does a beautiful job with the layout and navigation. A truly fun and addictive site.
Full disclosure: Today’s Blogtations page features the quotable quotations of none other than JD! I’m stupefied, but let me put my own selfish emotions aside to make a suggestion: How about from now on, every blogger in the land devotes a Friday post to I Do Things? It’s the least you could do, after I all do for you so you don’t have to.
Seriously, I’m really honored to be highlighted and included in the company of so many awesome blogs. Folks, there are some gems in here; please take the time to dig around (after you’re done reading mine, of course).
Blogtations got me thinking about all the great quotes from my beloved commenters—a very quotable bunch, in my opinion—so I did some culling of my own and found these gems tucked away in the comments sections of I Do Things posts.
Enjoy! And much thanks to Musing, a fellow quote lover, notebook keeper, and non-cook.
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Alice from Honey Child
(Your advice) can’t possibly be worse than my mom’s advice like—eating pickles will give you acidic blood.
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Amy
While trying to add documents to a 3-ring binder the rings popped open and a reams-worth of paper cascaded out everywhere. All I thought was ctrl+z.
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ann of the shampoo bag
The thought of those port-o-potties makes me shudder. The waiting in line, the nervous sweat, the dark interior, murmuring of prayers, hoping against hope that I’ll make it out alive, reminds me of my Catholic grade school days when our entire class would go to weekly confessions.
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April from April’s Rants
For the love of jesus eat the whole fucking donut!
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Babs (Beetle) from Beetle Blog
Some of my sisters have cardboard willies!
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Canucklehead
If you are going to continue in this way I may have to revoke your statues.
Oh and yo—eatin’ in the john is way wack fo’ sure. You need to be rollin’ in the kizzle with that fly sammy. Represent, aa-ight! etc. . .
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Cardiogirl
Last summer my neighbor attempted to bring the turban back. It really only caught on in her yard.
Tell me to pick a candy bar in ten seconds and I will start to hyperventilate.
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Cindy Lietz, The Polymer Clay Tutor
I did bleach [my hair] Billy Idol White and then perm it. My hair didn’t respond so well to the punishment, and fell out in big chunks! . . . Rebel Yell!!!
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Corrina from My Random Blog
It sucks that beer and bladders hate each other so.
I would rather cover the entrance to my house with a giant garbage bag than go to Lowe’s.
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Daisy the Curly Cat
I am pretty sure the Good Samaritan code of conduct states that you only have to allow THREE people in front of you in line. After that, it is okay to become a Bad Samaritan. Also, you should allow anyone buying bags of cat treats to step to the head of the line. In case there is a treat emergency.
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DanandMarsh from Contests at GIVEAWAY CITY
I wasn’t expecting a pooper scraper!!
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Dave
Sex with a Frenchman . . . hmmf.
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elasticwaistbandlady from The Smiling Infidel
Is Devil’s Food Cake made out of real Devils or just his food?
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Elle from Maxwell the Tattooed Boy and Other Astounding Joys
Do they have any Everyone Else Must Be Blind While Elle Is Nude Beaches? For I fear this is the only way I could do nude.
I thought Neil Diamond’s “Forever in Blue Jeans” was a fundraiser kind of a song for an evangelist and his baby. Instead of “forever in blue jeans, baby,” I heard: “For Reverend Blue Jean’s Baby.”
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Ernie from Redneck Bar & Grill
One thing sadder than half a doughnut would be half a doughnut-hole.
I only watched Paris Hilton’s video so that you wouldn’t have to.
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ettarose from Edge of Insanity
American Idol really sucks butter beans through a garden hose.
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Fashion Paramedic
I watched American Idol on Vikey too!!
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Gerri from Absolutely True
Nothing puts me in the mood more than seeing a man do the dishes!
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H. from Ducks of Happiness
I’m the Zorro of naps.
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Jeff from View from the Cloud
Just think how much money the transport companies would save if all babies were shipped with square heads. You know, because they stack better.
Who among us HASN’T been hoisted in the air by a sweaty male stripper?
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jennypenny from I’m Having a Thought Here
I’m not disrobing in public until I’ve had a lobotomy.
I’m not throwing [my wedding dress] away, though . . . when I lose 75 pounds I’ll dye it black, cut it off, and wear it to Wal-Mart. With a hat. And most likely a diaper!
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JT from TheGothMom.com
Sheesh, show your balls people! Or not, I prefer to look at pretty ones.
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Kali from Made by Kali
I hate it when you bite into something yummy and suddenly realize that it’s not a chocolate chip in your mouth but a yucky raisin.
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Kathy from The Junk Drawer
I could never, ever, ever use one of those reflective glass walled toilets out on the street. NEVER, EVER, EVER. Not for a million bucks. NEVER. EVER. Did I say NEVER?
Hidden candy goes in the car, not the pantry. But only in cooler months, if you have food that can melt or become soggy. Yes. I’m a professional food hider. Is that bad?
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Kelly from Aerten Art
I’m an alien from another planet and don’t like chocolate.
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kool breeze
I LOVE TO BE NUDE!!!!
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Laura from That Grrl
I get a lot of spam in other languages. I must be getting out a lot more than I thought I was.
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Lisa Lisa
I would probably slap someone for saying they didn’t like bcon.
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Lord Likely from The Astonishing Adventures of Lord Likely
The final photograph makes me want to squeeze a bird, as it were!
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Lori from My Scattered Ramblings
Oooooooo! Bubbles! I love bubbles!!
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Natural from Thinking Out Loud
Yeah, when animals that normally should run away come toward you, that’s your hint to get the heck out of there.
I will levitate over a toilet if I have to to keep from sitting on it.
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Regan
Everything is better in cube form.
I couldn’t write one
Of these haikus for my life
Hey look! I just did
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Shieldmaiden from Dispatches from the Northern Outpost
NO CLOWNS! NO CLOWNS! NO CLOWNS!
My husband sleeps with [our cat] tucked under his arm like a perfectly caught spiral pass.
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Stephanie from Vat19.com slash Blog
I don’t know that I could ever have a crush on a cartoon character. For some reason I just imagine they would smell like crayons, and that’s definitely not a turn-on for me.
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Susan from My Right Brain
TENS and Vicodin, what else do you need?
Every house should have a powder room for guests only. Whenever a stranger asks to use mine, I don’t feel nearly as grossed out because I know my butt won’t be using it.
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Tiggy from TiggyBlog
Aircraft are dangerous at all times! Think about it, you never have a safety demonstration on trains or buses . . .
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Tim from The Redneck Bar & Grill
Did you say that the doctor prescribed meth is much less dangerous? I’m not sure if I can get behind that.
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Valerie Mackey (irate nudist)
It’s a butt.
* * *
Find more quotable bloggers at Humor Blogs!
There’s gold in them there comments! How nice of you to share them with your readers. I waited to drink my coffee until I made it through them all. Those are some snort-worthy comments. And congrats on getting spotlighted by Blogtations. Well-deserved!!!
Kathy’s last blog post..The Squirreliest Squirrel
Oh, JD, what a perfectly wonderful start to my day. Thanks for rounding up some gut-busting material.
It kinda makes you wonder what we’ve been smoking!
Oh, and congrats on being quotable. You should be glad to know that you were the catalyst of a very rousing conversation about nudity last night! Hubby says he’s game - or maybe it was the 12 beers talking!
Oh, great. Now I have like, a jillion times the pressure to write something funny! Like, um….. UNICORN!!
Was that good enough? I certainly hope so =)
‘Tis true - there are some gems in the comments.
Comments are the bread either side of a scrumptious filling!
Babs - beetle’s last blog post..Our living nightmare!
Kathy: Yup, GOLD! Little, shiny, glistening nuggets of comedy gold. Much love to my commenters. Y’all are the BEST!
ann of the shampoo bag: It was a fun little project. I think I’ll make this a regular topic. Everyone: BE FUNNY!
Lori: Yeah . . . , going through all the past posts and reading just the comments actually started to make me feel like I was tripping. Weird, fun people!
A “rousing” conversation, eh? Well, that’s the best kind. See what hubby says this morning, unless he’s too hungover.
Regan: Don’t worry. You will definitely be included in Volume 2: Quotable Commenters. However, I may not use “UNICORN!”
Babs - beetle: Aaaaand there’s the first quotation for my second collection! Well put!
Woo hoo! You’re famous(ish)!
And my mom’s acidic pickles will live on forever now thanks to you!
Alice’s last blog post..Punch Bug and the Eternal Card Game
I don’t know who’s funnier … you or your readers! Clearly we’re all in good company …
jennypenny’s last blog post..This Is My Town
This post totally rocks.
But I can’t imagine how hard it must have been for you to limit my witty comments down to just two. Your awesomeness knows no bounds.
Congrats on being featured so prominently at Blogtations. Musing is one wise cookie for selecting you!!!
I just found Blogtations; what a neat-o site! Reading all of your reader’s quotes here made my day. And I feel very proud inside that one of mine was included! But now I have stage-fright and I cannot think of anything funny to say. Goodbye.
Daisy the Curly Cat’s last blog post..Fashion Friday: Ahoy, Matey!
Yay! Congratulations to you! You deserve it - you do have a way with words!
I dare not go too often to Blogtations in case I get sucked in to drown among the quotes, feebly crying out ‘F1!! F1!!!’
Funny enough for ya? Well, I tried. LOL!
Jay’s last blog post..Let’s not jump to conclusions …
Alice: YAY! And so is your mom. I hope she’s proud!
jennypenny: Yeah, I think we’re just one big, happy, funny, crazy bunch.
Jeff: WOO! You know, there were some people who had a LOT of potential quotes. I won’t say who they were, but you were one. Oops! Did I say that out loud?
Daisy the Curly Cat: Daisy, I have a secret for you: You are ALWAYS funny—even when you don’t try. So you don’t have to worry. Just be yourself.
Jay: Thank you! You have been added to the new list!
JD — I am HORRIFIED! When did I say I was the Zorro of naps?! I must’ve taken TWO vikey that day. I do remember tweeting about Zorro, though. Damn. I need to stop drinking Cosmos while on illicit drugs. I mean, I’ll stop tomorrow. It IS Friday, after all!!
Fashion Paramedic’s last blog post..A Fun By-Product of California’s New Cell Phone Law
BTW: This post made me pee my pants. Thank GOD I was wearing a pantyliner. And my girdle. So no pee pee stains on my cute jean capris today!
Fashion Paramedic’s last blog post..A Fun By-Product of California’s New Cell Phone Law
What a FABULOUS idea this is!! I don’t remember the last time I laughed that hard! Some of your commenters are hilarious!
And I’m not sure why, but Cardiogirl’s “Last summer my neighbor attempted to bring the turban back. It really only caught on in her yard.” made me laugh so hard I, seriously, peed.
And THANK YOU for fixing the typo on my bladder thing. LOL
Corrina’s last blog post..Voice Mail That Doesn’t Suck
What fun! You’ve got some witty readers here!
Musing’s last blog post..Highlighted blog: I Do Things So You Don’t Have To
What a great idea for a blog. I found your site through StubleUpon.
Koka’s last blog post..iPhone 2.0 - An upgrade for disaster
Fashion Paramedic: No, I think I was on Vikeys! That was someone else! Oh, dear. I’ll fix this tomorrow. So sorry. I hope you aren’t too horrified. I thought I was being soooo careful.
VIKIES!
(Well, at least it made you laugh. And with your pantyliner and girdle comments, you have made it into the 2d Edition of Quotable Commenters!)
Corrina: It was so fun! The hard part was trying to whittle down the list. Typos are fixed free of charge around here.
Musing: Don’t I, though! This was a fun post, and I have you to thank. Hope you get lots of witty readers and submissions!
Koka: Welcome! All Stumblers are granted free admission. Hope you’ll stick around and enjoy the fun!
ROFL! These were funny and I need the laugh. My favorite though is: Oh, Do Shut Up. LOL. Cracks me up, could be the wine though.
I’ve only used it once since reading it on your blog. I have to remember to write it in the palm of my hand as a reminder to use it more often.
A post dedicated to JD every Friday? We blog, so you don’t have to? lol. I’ll have to find a way to highlight your blog then, you are just too darn useful not to be a household name.
Natural’s last blog post..Brain Damaged
Oh! I lost your blog in blogosphere but was able to locate it again from my ‘yesterday’s clicks’. What a wonderful post, you made so many people feel special or rather laugh.:)
‘For the love of jesus eat the whole fucking donut!’ This a million dollar comment.:p
Scratch Bags’s last blog post..There are bugs on my ears!
Natural: Remember, “Oh, do shut up” must be used sparingly. It’s far less effective when said in every other sentence.
Boy, if I’d known I might be a household name, I’d've come up with something more memorable than “JD”!
Scratch Bags: I’m glad you found me again! Specialness and laughter, that’s what it’s all about here. And I couldn’t do it without my wonderful readers.
I meant to say “Oh dooo shut up!” on my Voki but forgot ;O)
Babs - beetle’s last blog post..Our living nightmare!
Babs - beetle: Wait, what’s Voki?
These comments are too funny. It’s amazing how odd things sound without a back story to go with them.
Monique’s last blog post..Does This Mean I Have A Life?
These were so funny! I have to remember to spend more time reading comments. And to try to comment on more blogs. Comments rule!
Susan’s last blog post..Too Much of a Good Thing?
Oh JD! I can’t believe I made the list!
I’d like to first thank JD for having an awesome blog on which to comment.
I’d like to thank the Academy for inspiring me.
And lastly I’d like to thank my neighbor who would absolutely kill me with her bare hands if she knew how often I wrote about her *and* the code name I have given her.
I do it for the art of the written word, people.
Thanks again JD! You’re the best!
Monique: I know, right! I thought about including the link to the original post or a brief explanatory note, but that took all the fun out of it (and would’ve taken me 8 hours instead of 4).
Susan: I don’t always take the time to read comments, but as Kathy above said (and she oughtta know—she has GREAT commenters), “there’s gold in them thar comments.”
Cardiogirl: How could a quotable quotations post NOT include a Cardiogirl comment? That’s like cereal without milk, donuts without holes, Gus without Prudence, your neighbor without her turban!
You used that quote :S erf! You know tho’, I think Blogtations was how I came across you in the first place! I followed a link to someone else’s blog where you had made a funny comment, so I followed it back and laughed even harder reading the real thing. In fact I think that’s how I found a couple of my fav blogs!
JT’s last blog post..My first meme
JT: Well, however you got here, I’m glad you came and stuck around. And I hope you don’t mind me using that quote. It was quite ballsy.
“Jay: Thank you! You have been added to the new list!”
Um .. what new list? But thank you! LOL!
Jay’s last blog post..The Amazing Jumping Water
Jay: Uhhh . . . I think what I meant was that your “F1″ quote has been added to the list I’m compiling for my 2d edition of quotes. Or I was just babbling incoherently. Either way: congratulations!
Ballsy? LOL, ballsy!
JT’s last blog post..The Rainbow Family, Part 3. The End