I Do Things So You Don’t Have To

I’ve kicked the habit Shed my skin This is the new stuff I go dancing in If you know nothing else about me, know this: I like to move it, move it. I don’t care how and I don’t care when. My parts must jiggle. My heart must pound. My sweaty ponytail must swirl. But [...]

The mush was as tasty As tasty could be Hey, y’all! It’s another food post! Should I just bag the whole I Do Things concept and rename this blog “JD’s Dumbass Emporium of Food and Medical Procedures”? You can get back to me on that. Anyway, for about a hundred years my mom has been [...]

Her arms are wicked and her legs are long But you already knew that, right? Because ALL of you read about it here. You already know that I am a half-breed — or should I say “part-breed,” for that is the term I coined in that popular post. So it seems everyone knew. Everyone but [...]

Yeah, it took some help With lots of machines, the experts could tell Yup! I recently enjoyed a lovely stay at a 5-star hospital. And here’s what it was like. My Digs I had the best room on the floor. Far from the noise of the nurses’ station and set off so that the other [...]

Pancakes are for eating, not licking It’s rare that Dave and I wake up at the same time. But a few weeks ago, when his foot touched mine on a Saturday morning, I knew there was a reason. “I want pancakes,” I said, “such that can be found only at Jack’s” (a nearby diner-type restaurant). [...]

What a lovely, lovely picture You’re my treasured work of art So, as you may recall, there was this contest at I Do Things regarding candy bars. There were also interminable videos featuring some stupid camera effects and lots of nervous twitching. There was soap. There was poorly cued music. But most important, there were [...]